Even Though I Walk

This life can be just full of surprises, can’t it?

I remember a super exciting surprise happening in my life about 27 years ago, when I found out I was pregnant with my son. I had been dealing with some major fertility issues, had lost a baby, and was gearing up to go through IVF for the last time. But before we could go through that, God intervened and I, after being told repeatedly “there’s no way you can get pregnant without fertility measures,” found myself carrying the child I had ardently prayed for, had actually begged God for.

I carried that pregnancy test around in my purse for weeks! I would pull it out and just stare at it, thinking to myself,

“Is this for real? Am I really pregnant?”

I was so thankful, felt so, so “blessed and highly favored!” God had absolutely known the desires of my heart and came through in such a beautiful, mighty way. I felt so seen and understood and just so privileged that God would actually perform a miracle. For me, just regular, old Sherra.

Well, I went on to deliver that little baby boy and he has been the proverbial apple of my eye for the past twenty-six years and will be for the rest of my life. That gift from God was so profound and fulfilling that I almost hate to ask for anything else, you know?

It's so easy to praise God and trust Him in the midst of wonderful surprises, isn’t it? Unfortunately, these kinds of surprises are not the only ones we’ll experience in this life. I’ve experienced the “other” version over the past nine months.

Nine months ago I was diagnosed with cancer – quite unexpectedly. I was having issues with my pancreas, went in for a test, and my doctor asked if I wanted to go ahead and do my routine colonoscopy while I was under anesthesia.

“Sure,” I said. Yes, let’s kill two birds with one stone, was the only thought I had. And, lo and behold, there was a tumor in my colon. Shock of all shocks.

Being diagnosed with cancer was a very strange experience for me. My parents were in a car accident the day I found out the tumor was malignant, and as I drove to meet them, I just kept thinking,

“Huh. So I have cancer. Huh.”

I was really kind of surprised that the sun was shining, people were going about their day, and I had cancer. So. Weird.

At this point, after nine months, I’ve been through all treatment except for surgery and am awaiting a decision on that. God, I’m happy to report, has been with me every step of the way and my family and so many friends have provided a support system, second to none. I feel so blessed.

After we finished up our study of Titus, I was trying to figure out what to study next and I remembered that my good buddy, Lisa Lamey, had written a Bible study called Light for Shadowed Places. I had helped her edit it and thought,

“This would be a great time to go through that!”

Y’all. If you’re looking for a good Bible study this summer, I highly recommend this study. It takes several Scriptures from the Bible, having to do with light, and takes you through an in-depth study of each. Please check it out here, you won’t be sorry!

The first verse was none other than Psalm 23:4,

Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and Your staff protect and comfort me.

I cannot begin to tell you how that verse resonated with me.

The thing is, I never, ever expected to be diagnosed with cancer. Um, never. At 55 years old, I’ve lived through the days where a cancer diagnosis, of almost any kind, meant a death sentence. That kind of “surprise” can leave the most faith-filled of us confused and concerned, to say the very least. And I had some days like that. But as I thought back over this process, while studying Psalm 23:4, I realized that I had way more days of faith and peace – even as I walked through cancer.

John 16:33 tells us this,

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in Me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.

The shepherd, above maybe anyone else, understood the dark valley. There were times, while caring for his sheep, that he was forced to lead them through dark, shadowy valleys, but He was ready to protect and comfort his sheep at any moment during these times. He was always ready, never lazy or casual. Why? Because he loved his sheep, their care was his chief concern, and he knew that sometimes valleys are full of danger.

Because God is our Good Shepherd, He walks us through our darkest valleys. He never expects us to go it alone, to know where to step next, to be able to see all the danger in the darkness. He cares for us so much more than we can even imagine and longs for us to lean on Him – during the good times, the bad times, and even when we find ourselves shocked and dismayed by our circumstances.

When we walk through a valley way darker than we ever thought a valley could be, God is not shocked; He is not caught off guard; He is not without a plan – a good plan. He knows we’re going to struggle and all He asks of us in these moments is to leave it all to Him and to trust that He’s got us. We will walk through dark valleys in this life, but we will walk through them because of God’s faithfulness and His great love. And I’m living proof!

So, I’m not sure what dark valley you’re walking through today: maybe it’s a financial valley, maybe your marriage is full of scary shadows, maybe one of your children is wandering through a valley and you don’t know which way to turn, maybe, like me, you’re experiencing a health scare that makes “the valley of the shadow of death” take on new meaning. No matter the circumstance, God is bigger! He’s bigger than the wild predators in the darkness, He’s bigger than cancer, He’s bigger than our biggest fears, and He knows the way out of the shadows. Follow Him, Friend, His way always leads to safety.