Learning it for myself.

At the start of the new year I, like so many of you, wanted to set a goal to spend more time in my Bible. Until recently reading the Bible was intimidating and felt like I was reading a different language. I had never read a whole book much less the entire Bible. But I began the journey of learning how to actually study, I wanted to know more of the references and back story. I had the hunger to know it all but no idea how to do it. 

A couple of mentors of mine were going to read The Chronological Study Bible In A Year. I jumped on board. Eager to fill in the gaps. After just a few days of reading I realized very quickly how different the Sunday school teachings I received as a child were from the actual text.

As I got to the book of Job I felt a familiar feeling of unworthiness set in. I remembered Job’s story from my childhood. I remembered him as this man who had faith in God as big as the sky. I remember the teaching about him going through horrific struggles, losing all of his earthly possessions, and being unimaginably sick. In my understanding as a child and young adult Job never turned his back on God, he kept his faith through the struggles and God in the end restored him fully because of it. 

To a young girl this propelled a cycle of a not good enough mentality. As trials came my way and I caught myself questioning where God was, or what I had done so wrong in my life to deserve this I would immediately feel like a weak christian. Job endured way more and still trusted God through it, why couldn’t I? Questioning if bad things kept happening to me because of my disbelief. 

Fast forward to a 32 year old women still feeling that same need to compare myself to other christians and seeing that today’s study was Job. I knew I was about to feel immense guilt for not being as faithful as I thought he was. 

This is where God revealed to me the importance of reading, studying, and understanding His word for myself.

If I had only ever depended on other people’s teaching of Job, I would have never learned, what I feel, is the most important part of this story. 

What was left out to me was that Job did question, he did argue, and cried out. He did blame God. He felt alone and as if God had forgotten about him. He felt the weight of his earthly trials. Just as we all do. 

Job did keep his faith but it was not as big as the sky, in fact it was as small as a mustard seed. 

I’m here to tell you friends that that part of the story is the good news for you and me. God only needs faith as small as a mustard seed to move in our life. He did not require a scholarly knowledge of the Bible from me to reveal himself. He will never turn away from you when you do have questions or doubts. Those are the moments that He will show up in big ways, like full restoration and understanding. 

These details changed my entire perspective on God and His word. Job’s level of faith wasn’t unattainable for me. I just had not been given all the information. We need the context, and the complete text. Not just the verses that pop up on our verse of the day or the small section preached about on Sunday. We need the word in its entirety. 

Reading this ancient text feels intimidating, and there is still so much I don’t understand yet, but the more I read it, the easier it comes. All He needs is your commitment to trying. 

He has put incredibly smart people in my circle that do understand and enjoy helping other people understand too, and if He did that for me He will do it for you. 

What Biblenerds has taught me is life changing. Having the skill set to know how to study, allows you to bring this old book of words, from a completely different part of the world, alive and relatable to you in every season of life, even some of the seasons you’re not in anymore. 

It has healed parts of me that were injured because of not knowing the good and faithful father that He has always been. 

So I encourage you to just start, pick it up and read. You’re never late or behind. Use the resources that Biblenerd offers to help educate you as you learn. 

You will never regret knowing Him deeper and I can promise you one thing, He has a word waiting for you.